True school life experiences written and illustrated by a boy with autism. Lee was diagnosed with autism at age 6. Creating a world view of his own and authentically in his own words, he identifies struggles of being bullied and being misunderstood and the challenges he faces academically. He has many dreams and of which he sees himself as a writer in the making. He loves to express himself through drawing and writing. Like many of us, they want to be understood and accepted. Follow him in his journal entries as he charms his way into your heart.

Tuesday, 3 January 2022

Dear Diary,

School started today.

I forgot just how loud everything was until the first bell rang. It was so noisy that I covered my ears to muffle the sound, but it was not enough. I thought that if I could distract myself, it would make the noise go away, so I banged my head against my table. The metal was cold and hard. “He’s having a meltdown again.” My classmate said loudly, pointing at me. People started staring, and Brandon whispered something to Chloe. She laughed at his remark. Did he tell a joke? I think it must have been a very funny joke.

During recess, Brandon and Chloe pointed at me as they walked past. I asked if I could sit with them and they told me no. No one ever sits with me during recess. They all have their own friends. I want to be their friend too, but they do not seem to want me around. It makes me sad.

When I got home, I cried in my room. I thought this year would be different, but my classmates still treat me the same as before. When my mom saw me crying, she hugged me and told me to be strong, and that these things will pass eventually.

_______________________

Wednesday, 4 February 2022

Dear Diary,

I drew forty-three sunflowers during Science lesson. Mrs. Ang asked me to stay back. She told me that I should stop doodling in class and pay attention. I think she does not like my sunflowers. Maybe she prefers Daisies or Buttercups. But I like sunflowers. You can never have enough sunflowers.

Some time ago, Mom said that in a faraway place called Australia, people with a hidden disability can choose to wear a lanyard with lots of sunflowers on it. It tells people that they may need more time, support and understanding. It is recognised in many places like airports, public transport and even museums. The lanyard sounds nice, maybe I should ask my mom about getting one.

_______________________

Thursday, 19 March 2022

Dear Diary,

We learnt about circles today. Mr. Ong asked us to form groups of four. No one came to ask me to join their group, so I sat at my desk until Mr. Ong added me to Kai Ling’s group.

When I went to sit with my group, Kai Ling moved her chair away from mine. The other group members did the same thing. I asked them if they would be able to hear me from so far away, and they said yes. Mr. Ong came to our group and asked why their chairs were arranged in that way, and Kai Ling said that she did not want me to join her group. I think Kai Ling does not like me. She told me last year that my sunflowers were ugly.

Mr. Ong sighed and told them to ‘play nice’ and to ‘be more accommodating’. ‘Accommodating’ is a long word. We learnt about it in English class last year. It means “to be willing to fit in with someone’s needs.”

At the end of the lesson, Mr. Ong asked for fun facts about circles. Wei Qi raised his hand and answered that a circle’s diameter was twice its radius. I raised my hand too and said that circles are a shape found in sunflowers, but Mr. Ong shook his head. He asked me to ‘try again’ and said that he was looking for another kind of answer. I was not sure what he meant by that, so I replied with ‘try again’. Then all my classmates burst out laughing. Wei Qi, who laughed the loudest of them all, called me ‘stupid’. I do not know what that word means. Mr. Tan has not taught us about it in English class. I should ask him about it. I have been called that a lot in school. It must not be a good word, because Mr. Ong took Wei Qi outside the classroom and talked to him. When Wei Qi came back, he apologised to me. I am not sure what he is sorry for, but I told him that it was alright. Mom did always say to be kind to people.

During recess, Wei Qi asked me to follow him to a classroom. He said that he wanted to play a game with me. When I reached the classroom, there were a few of Wei Qi’s friends there. I said ‘hello’ to them, but they did not say ‘hello’ to me.

Wei Qi said that he didn’t deserve to be scolded by Mr. Ong, and that it was all my fault. His friends told me they were going to ‘teach me a lesson’. I wanted to ask what we were learning, but then one of them punched me in my stomach. It was very painful, and I told him to stop, but he did it over and over again. I put my hands over my stomach so that he would not hit me there. Wei Qi saw that I was crying and called me a ‘crybaby’.

I do not like Wei Qi and his friends.

I am going to bed early. I feel like crying.

_______________________

Friday, 20 March 2022

Dear Diary,

I could not do PE today because of my stomach. I told my PE Teacher Mrs. Tan about the pain and she asked me if I was alright. When I told her about what had happened yesterday with Wei Qi and his friends, her face got very red. She told me that what they did was wrong and that she had to report it.

During recess, Mrs. Tan brought me to the General Office and another teacher called the ‘Principal’ asked me some questions. After I answered all of them, he spoke with Mrs. Tan. The principal called my mom and instructed me to come to the General Office after school.

We gathered at the General Office. The air conditioner there is very cold. Wei Qi and his friends were brought into the room not long after. Wei Qi told me that he was really sorry this time, that he knew what he and his friends did was wrong and that he would never treat me that way again. The boy who hit me also apologised.

I hope that what happened yesterday will never happen to me again.

_______________________

Saturday, 4 June 2022

Dear Diary,

Mom and Dad want me to go to a ‘SPED School’. I asked them what that was and they said that it was because I am special and that it was safer and more suited to my needs. Mom told me that I can learn at my own pace at a SPED School, and that from next week onwards, it will be my school. It sounds like an ‘accommodating’ place, so I think I will be happier there. She told me she was sorry and it finally made sense that she should have heeded the advice of a counsellor and placed me there in the beginning. She kept saying she was sorry.

_______________________

13 August 2022

Dear Diary,

I am enrolled in a new school. We have 2 teachers to 21 students. I like my friends. Last Friday, Mom and Dad attended a talk at my school. The talk was by an organisation called ‘SNTC’. After the talk, Mom and Dad talked for an hour. This morning, they told me that they were going to set up a ‘SNTC Trust account’ for me. I do not know much about it, but I like the word ‘trust’ and I trust Mom. So, I will trust this ‘SNTC’. Mom says it will take care of me when her and Dad are gone. Dad also mentioned something about a ‘Gift Of A Lifetime Sponsorship Scheme’. I was curious about that and asked him to tell me more. He said he can have himself insured for $100k and have it entered my care needs when they die. I know “die” because grandma died last year. It was very sad. I cried more than when I was punched.

Dad also tells mom that there is a sponsorship scheme that goes hand in hand with the trust account and that it would help with funding the trust account. Dad sounded relieved. Mom was thrilled. First time, after a long while before I saw her smile. So, the sponsorship scheme must be a good thing. If Mom and Dad are happy, then I am too.

_______________________

14 August 2022

Dear Diary,

Oh, Mom gave me a piggy bank money jar. I put 50cent in today. My mom said she is thinking of signing up for the special needs saving scheme. I wonder what it is. Mom says it is like super saver super hero and I get withdraw money from it every month. Sound fun!

SNTC – Supported by the Ministry of Social and Family Development (MSF), Special Needs Trust Company (SNTC) is the only non-profit trust company set up to provide affordable trust services for persons with disabilities. Since 2014, the Special Needs Savings Scheme (SNSS) is also administered by SNTC. The purpose of SNTC is to provide a vehicle that ensures the financial security of persons with special needs is met when their parents or caregivers pass on. At SNTC, we have a team of trained social workers who will work with the caregivers to develop individualised care plans for each special beneficiary to meet their long-term care needs. For enquiries please contact SNTC at: 62789598 or email: enquiries@sntc.org.sg. For more information, visit us @: sntc.org.sg or facebook

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