Self-esteem is defined as a feeling of being happy with your character and your abilities. It is the force behind most success and failure, the force behind peak performance, successful achievement, living your dream and living your world! Over my many years of teaching, I realized that kids who have high self-esteem generally produce good results.
Therefore, I have come up with 5 extremely powerful ways which parents can use to boost their child’s self-esteem massively.
1) Delegate Tasks to Make them feel Important and Useful
Children feel low self-confident because they are made to feel small and unimportant. Their emotional need for ‘significance‘ is unmet. Hence, delegating tasks can make them feel important.
“Matthew, I am depending on you to take care of your brother while I go to work! I know you will be able to contribute to this family!”
“Sally, my legs are aching. Can you help mum a little favor by sweeping the floor?”
“I have a hard time paying the bills.
Clement, I really need your help to switch off the lights when you are not using.”
2) Use Words of Praise
One of the most effective ways to boosting your child’s self-esteem is to praise them sincerely. Ineffective parents like to focus on catching their children doing wrong things, while effective parents focus on catching their children doing great things and making them feel good about it.
One important point you should take note is you should always praise an effort or result rather than their character. Why? Studies have shown that when parents give praise to their children’s character like “you are so hardworking”. The children have a tendency to doubt the parents’ praise.
So instead of saying, “you are so hardworking,” you could say, “you have finished up the whole assessment book. That is so impressive!”
3) Give Them the Opportunity to Share their Achievements
This is one of the best ways to build up their self-confidence. It is to give them the opportunity to acknowledge and share their achievements.
After a family dinner, the parents can throw a question to every family member, “Share 1 thing I did today that I am very proud of.” It does not have to be a massive achievement. Simple ones like I help a friend with a question or I got praised by the teacher will do.
This will teach your children to feel good about themselves. It is not to make them become ‘show-offs’, but rather to develop a healthy respect for their self-worth.
4) Say the words “Great!” and “Excellent!”
These are the 2 most powerful words in the English dictionary. Saying them loud and full of energy will increase your children’s positive hormones and self-confidence by 5 per cent.
When you son has finished his homework, replied with, “Excellent! Great work!”
When your daughter has finished mopping the floor, shout out, “That is great! You have done me proud!”
Practise them constantly. They work like a charm.
5) Celebrate your children’s success
When your kids make a major achievement like scoring an ‘A’ for a test, or won a tournament, celebrate with them! Make it a family victory and they will feel like you are always behind them, supporting them. You do not have to buy them expensive gifts. The best way is to take them out to a sumptuous family meal.
Article by Study Grandmaster.
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