Spoilt kids are usually easy to detect in almost any situation. Basically, spoiling happens when the child is in control and the parent is not.
This happens when what rules are the child’s desires and not the parents’. Sometimes, you tend to evaluate yourself in some conditions to know if you are already spoiling a child.
Any parent can spoil a child in some cases. This is because we sometimes confuse love against discipline. Here are some ways on how a parent can avoid raising problems kids:
1. Do not confuse love against happiness – Most parents think that making their kids happy by giving them what they want is a way to show how much they love them. This could be dangerous because children will be used to pushing for anything they desire to the extent of going against house rules and discipline policies. This also happens when we allow our children to do things which make them happy like watching television even during wee hours.
2. Allow children to feel frustration and shame – Parents are not even happier to see their children fail. Spoiling a kid happens when we don’t want them to feel failure that we end up giving everything they want.
3. Let a kid deal with outburst – Parents usually fear that the child may give in to over-pouring of emotion. Their desire to stop their children from crying and screaming triggers spoiling.
4. Set Limits – Set house rules which you children should strictly adhere to. Children push because you don’t push and stand firm for the limitations you set.
5. Be consistent – As parents, you must bear in mind that you will never allow rules to be bent. Make a standardized limitation for your children especially if they belong to almost the same age brackets. If you did not allow your eldest to play during mealtime, you should not even say yes to your youngest to do the same. Universality is a must.
6. Instill values beyond materialism– Giving your child all the material possessions they want would cause them to want more. Let them learn contentment and satisfaction instead of desiring for material possessions. Envy is the root of desires. When a child argues how his or her playmates are given all the best toys in town, explain to them that different families have different rules.
Spoiling children is easier than keeping them grounded. However, as parents, learn to set limits for yourself and your kids so you can bid goodbye to spoiling days without hassles.
Do you have problems kids? How do you handle them? Mothers, we like to hear from you on how you balance love and discipline.