This Valentine’s Day, TNAP put two daddies in the spotlight on how they keep their love strong and going with their Mrs.

Andy and his wife Sengkang babies

Daddy #1: Andy Lee, daddy blogger at sengkangbabies.com
Wife: Teo Meng Choo
Occupation: Homemaker
No. of years married: 13
No. of kids: Four – Boon Wee 10 years old, Boon Kang 8 years old, Boon Yee 6 years old and Boon Xin 4 years old

1. Where and when did you meet?

In my first job, she was my customer. We always hangout in a group, and eventually she agreed to be my first girlfriend.

2. Who wears the pants in the relationship?

We complement each other. I am impatient she is calm (homework), I am good at house-cleaning (before CNY), she keeps everything. She is predictable, I am spontaneous.
If you really need to know, she wears the pants.

3. Who is the more romantic one and why?

I am always the one wooing, romancing, and initiating date nights. And I do not mind.
Especially now that our time is constantly stretched by family, work and kids.
I find it even more compelling to find time for each other.
We prefer to dine (pragmatic) then to shower each other with gifts.

Check out Andy’s idea of a date night at www.sengkangbabies.com/love/yes-to-date-nights

Andy's family

4. How has having children changed married life for the both of you?

We both love children, and we both underestimate how a child will change our perspectives and lifestyles. Very often we want the same objective, but differ on the approach. Decisions no longer affect only two of us, and we need to “consult” the kids too. We miss the last minute holidays and midnight shows!

5. How do you keep the flame burning? Any tips to share?

Little acts of Love like holding hands, a little peck here and there, and we show the kids that it is okay to express our love for our spouse. We hope they grow up to respect and love their partner too. Now that kids are more independent, I look forward to more date nights with my wife.

Related Post: Keeping the Romance Alive

6. What’s your secret to a successful and happy marriage?

Do not try to change the other person, we accommodate and grow together as a couple. Agree to disagree.

Sengkang Babies Family Potrait

Dr Kenneth Chua and wifeDaddy #2: Dr Kenneth Chua, Paediatrician from SBCC Baby and Child Clinic
Wife: Grace
Occupation: Literacy coach
No. of years married: 9
No. of kids: 2

1. Where and when did you meet?

We met in 2003 while rollerblading in East Coast Park. Grace’s cousin was the one who introduced us.

2. Who wears the pants in the relationship?

As the husband, I am the head of the household. But that does not mean I make all the decisions single-handedly. All major decisions are made with mutual loving discussion and much prayer.

3. Who is the more romantic one and why?

Now that’s a tough question! I would say we both try to show each other love daily through loving words, hugs (and kisses) and simple gestures. She would take the effort to prepare loving meals for me (she cooks Italian food well!) and I like to surprise her with gifts. For example, for one of her birthdays, I had quietly made the necessary childcare arrangements while surprising her with a short getaway to a nearby island resort, giving her just 2 hours to pack before taking the ferry.

Related Post: Ten Romantic Things to do for your Lover

4. How has having children changed married life for the both of you?

Having children is a real blessing! Having children adds another facet to our marriage and while we really enjoy our family time, we make an effort to set aside time to communicate with each other. We also try to have ‘date nights’ regularly. Despite being a father and mother, we are first and foremost, husband and wife.

5. How do you keep the flame burning? Any tip to share?

Keeping the marriage exciting and fun is more a daily process rather than just celebrating special events. Understanding the 5 love languages and communicating in the languages that matter to each of us has been very useful.

6. What’s your secret to a successful and happy marriage?

Marriage is a commitment to love your spouse wholeheartedly. Of course our marriage has not been plain smooth sailing and there have been ups and downs in our marriage. But it is our commitment to love each other that keeps us going. Being Christians, it also is very central to our marriage that we have a common faith and a common understanding of what marriage is.

For us, it is the small daily steps that are very important. After putting the kids to sleep, rather than watching television or using our electronic devices, we would spend time talking with each other, go for walks together or exercise together. We also make it a point to constantly verbalize our appreciation for each other and not to take things for granted.

Dr Kenneth Chua and family

This article was first published in The New Age Parents Feb / Mar 2014 e-magazine

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