I am Angry with my Shy Little Boy…

July 15, 2008

I am always to teach myself about composure but at times just seem to lost it. I may not lash my tongue at my boy, Ashton but the unhappy stare from me shows it all.

I thought being a mum means loving and accepting who you child is but this doesn’t really happen. I was shock by my own emotional struggle. I wanted to love him for what he is but at the same the other side of me can’t help getting upset with his shyness.

I send Ashton and Ashlyn out to play with a neighbour’s daughter today as I decide to get lunch ready for them before setting for my own time. My caretaker can’t take care of the 2 of them so decide to bring Ashlyn home with me anyway. When I step out of my house to check on Ashton few minutes later, I was shock to see him hiding behind the caretaker and clingling on to her leg. In my heart, I was thinking:”oh my! I hate this sight. he is a boy and boys shouldn’t behave this way!”

I called him over to my side and instantly, he insisted I carry him and I rejected him straight. In the end, he was so upset and decide to head for home. He requested I played with him but I refused, telling him that I need to put Ashlyn to bed, Deep in my heart, I was still unhappy and the sight of Ashton makes me mad! I was so guilty about it but just can’t bring myself to talk to him. It took me quite a while to convince myself to be compose again.

I kept asking myself if my expectations on Ashton is too high. I am an introvert myself but why can’t I accept my son being one as well. I know deeply within myself that accepting who is he and encouraging him to open up is a better way to help him and I need to convince myself to work harder on that. Why do you deal with your shy little ones?

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2 Responses to “I am Angry with my Shy Little Boy…”

Zachary said:

July 16th, 2008 at 10:41 am

The Power Of Ignorance

Lots of time children tends to show their rebellion side in order gets the things or ways they want to. It is some sort of “power-challenging”. The child will think this is an authority to them if you acknowledge this sort behavior. Continuously giving them “authority” will make them more rebellious and obviously it will tested out your temper to the maximum. The only way is to ignore them when they start to showcase their annoying behavior.

As a parent, I did not expect anything from my child except he is a good kid and healthy. It is totally ok if you son is shy. What’s the problem with introvert?
elaine said:

July 16th, 2008 at 3:06 pm

Maybe I should change the word “deal with” to “encourage”. In fact, I wanted to encourage him out of the nutshell so that he could be more confident in himself in the future. I personally feels that shyness will in some ways affect his self-confident and it will deter him from bringing out his full potential.

Everyone defines parenting differently. I totally agree with you that health is the number 1 priority for our children and they rebel to challenge us.

However, his shyness is a concern to me because I define parenting as… being loving to your child and at the same time bring out their fullest potential within inflicting too much stress.