How does a working mother day begin? And how does a stay at home mother day begin? The New Age Parents caught up with 4 mothers to find out more.
Monica Christine Fernando, 43 years old, Masters Student and part time family educator and speaker
Married to Ramylal Fernando, Trainer. Has three children, 18, 13, & 9 years old.
I get up at: 4.30am. A typical day starts off with :I wake up, fix breakfast for my kids, send them off to school, Get ready and set off for my studies or internship site. I try to come back home when my children return from school to serve them lunch. Most afternoons I’m with my children especially the youngest. I do counseling 7pm-9pm at my internship site twice a week.
When my kids are in school: I’m studying or counseling.
I see my kids again: In the afternoon after school.
I tuck my children to be at: I do tuck my youngest to bed most nights at 9pm, however some nights my husband does it if I’m not back yet.
Bedtime for me is: 11.30pm. I start attending to my studies at 9pm and sleep around 11.30-12pm
I wouldn’t change my current ‘job’ for the world because: I have been there for my kids while they were still young and needed me around. Now since they are grown and are teenagers (17 and 13) and my youngest 9 years, I can involve myself in work I’m passionate at doing – counseling and conducting parenting talks. But I will definitely make time for my kids when they need me around.
How do you juggle your time with your kids:
I have a very supportive husband. We share our responsibilities and take turns to be with the children. Spending some quality time on a daily basis with my kids help me bond and relate to them well. However, meeting all these requirements can be quite challenging.
What are the challenges in your journey as a mother : Parenting is never an easy task. I thank God for sustaining me to raise my 3 kids, and they are a blessing to me. Completing a Master’s degree during the last 2.5 yrs. was a challenge while playing an active role as a Mom.
What is the biggest thing you learn as a mother: To be aware that I am a role model to my children, whom they follow after. This awareness constantly help me discipline myself in order to be a loving and empathetic parent to my kids
Goh Pee Ing, 55, Human Resource Manager
Married to Matthew Pereira, journalist. Has three children, 24, 22, 21 years old.
I get up at: 6.30 am
My typical day starts with: getting myself ready for work. Prepare breakfast for the family while trying to find out what is happening in my sons’ lives during the half an hour or so before leaving for work. Throughout the day, we would share nuggets of info of what is happening to through Whatsapp or via phone call. That way, even our daughter who is overseas knows what is happening.
I work: from 8am to 5.30pm.
I see my kids again at: Night. I usually wait up for them to catch a brief word with them before going to bed. If my husband is on the late shift, we sometimes go down near his office to have dinner with him.
Bedtime for me is usually : after 11pm
I wouldn’t change my current ‘job’ for the world because : Firstly, I enjoy my work, what I do gives me a sense of satisfaction. Just as important, it allows me to spend time with my family. Seldom am I required to work late.
How do you juggle your time with your kids : When my kids were younger almost all my time after work was spent with them. My social engagements and other interests were put on hold. The only thing I was able to do then was my daily run. I got up at 5.30am and was back by 6.30am to get them ready for school. Now, I run at lunchtime in the gym and it frees my morning and evenings to be with my family.
What are the challenges in your journey as a mother: All 3 of them are so different in their character and personality. It is challenging trying to understand and interact effectively with them. They respond to different approaches at different times, at different ages. I feel that I made mistakes along the way but that is inevitable.
The other was with time. I wish I could have had more time with them especially when they were young. I would have liked to have taken a few years off work to look after my children full time. But that is easy to say when one is comfortable. Back then, with the house and renovation and all sorts of expenses, I tended to feel that I needed to work.
I would cite the third as seeing less of the children as they moved into their teens. They began to spend more time in school, with friends etc. Trying to stay connected with them also getting tougher.
What is the biggest thing you learn as a mother: Loving and making sacrifices for the children
What are the challenges in your journey as a mother and what are the biggest things you learned (or still learning), as a mother? Share them with us below!
For Part II of the interview, go to http://thenewageparents.com/a-day-in-mummys-shoes-part-ii/
By Som Yew Ya
This article was first published in The New Age Parents Apr / May 2013 e-magazine